Script problem

A big issue that we had towards the end of preproduction was the late realization that our script did not have a solid story.  This problem came to my attention by pure chance when I met a friend over the Christmas break who is a screen writer by profession.

She was interested in what script I had received for my final film and I told her the story outline for Castles in the Air.  Afterwards she pointed out the she was failing to see what the core story was.  When I asked if she could elaborate, she explained that she could not see how any change occurs in Tom and that this was a problem because he is the protagonist.  She further pointed out that if we didn't correct the problem we could be in danger of losing our audience's attention in the first couple of minutes. 

As soon as I was home I re examined the script and realised she was correct.  We had passed the script lock deadline but when I considered the potential problems of putting all our hard effort into a film that lacked a central story, I decided the risk was too great and that a rewrite was urgently needed.

The story problem was essentially as follows. In the first act, Tom learns upsetting news about the progress of a loved one who is ill.  In the second act, he has a conversation with his deceased wife, Geraldine, during which he breaks down.  After she tells him he needs to be strong, he goes back to the hospital.  In the final act, he receives positive news that Mary will be ok and we learn she is his daughter.  Tom hasn't undergone any necessary character change by this point and whether or not Mary lives, dies or stays the same is purely circumstantial.

I decided that the conversation with Geraldine in scene two held the key to solving the issue.  I added some dialogue that alluded to an event in Tom's past which Geraldine reminds him of. Through this he realizes he has the strength to cope and support Mary no matter what the outcome. 

We hadn't encountered the problem during the script workshop stage in preproduction because we saw that primarily as a time to conduct dialogue and production rewrites.  I also think we were a bit blinded due to being so careful not to compromise the twist at the end.